The Gift of Friends
A couple days ago, July 29th, the gospel in many liturgical calendars related Jesus’ visit to the home of 3 of his closest friends as it was the feast day of Mary, Martha and Lazarus. We are not explicitly told just how close their relationship was to Jesus, but via scripture scholars and connecting the dots, as it were, we can validly surmise that the home of these 3 became a place of respite for the itinerant Jesus—-a place he could count on to share laid-back meals and conversation with friends who understood him, believed in him and in his mission. He could come away for the tenacious crowds hungrily seeking a cure, a story, forgiveness. At the home of these 3 beloved friends Jesus was assured of privacy, safety, quiet and peace. I once had a Scripture professor who described this home as the place Jesus went to “hang out, relax, have burgers and fries!!”
In July 29th’s gospel, only 2 are home. Lazarus has died and Jesus is “late,” arriving many days after hearing the news. Martha and Mary are grief-stricken and this is one of only a few gospel narratives giving us a powerful image of the depth of Jesus’ human emotion: he too gives way to grief over the loss of this dear, dear friend…he weeps and makes no effort to hide it.
I am struck by the value Jesus gives to the life-enhancing gift of true human friendship. If we are so lucky, we can count at least ONE such friendship in our life…someone who knows us, understands us, and loves us anyway. Someone whose home is ours too and a place where we are always welcomed and can be ourselves. We are powerfully blessed if we have more than one such friend!
Pause with me a moment and bring to mind the someone or someones in your life who you count as close and precious friends…see them before you in your mind’s eye. Name them aloud. They hold the Story of You. And you hold theirs. As you live each day of August, the last full month of Summer, relish their many gifts and lift up the men and women you call friends. Intentionally enjoy their invitation to an August barbecue perhaps, or an evening get-together! Invite them over to your house and choose a simple, thoughtful way to tell them how much they add to your life.
I’ll be getting together with 6 other women soul-sisters tonight to celebrate our 10th anniversary of friendship: one forged in pain and crisis, but together we lived through the loss and helped each other grow in acceptance, peace, and a renewed desire to work for justice wherever we find it lacking. I’m not sure where I’d be without them.
The death of a close friend empties us and breaks us wide-open. But this is the cost of the love and goodness this friendship gifted us with. “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” (Lord Tennyson)
May these August days descend on you and bless you as you stay steeped still in summer’s rich gifts: seashore days, ripe tomatoes, prolific roses, earlier but intense sunsets tha hold the promise of a new season not here yet, but on the way! August blessings on you and all your dear friends: find a way to tell them how you feel!
